Episode 4 - Internet Randomness

When you have a profile on a dating site, you're guaranteed to get lots of random messages.

Creepy Old Man.  His message was "Nice boobs, young lady."  EEEEWWWWWWW.  

Boy Toy.  He was 24, had a good job, we had similar interests, and he was very attentive.  We went on 2 dates, he bought me a bottle of Moscato.  Problem?  I wasn't attracted to him.  Nada, zero, zilch on the chemistry meter.  Plus there was that whole age difference thing.  I don't usually date younger than myself - for good reason.  It was kinda like chatting with a brick wall.  But alas, Boy Toy found someone his own age and while I thought I was ghosting on him, he was ghosting on me.  Looks like we have our mutual dislike in common.

Episode 3 - The Heart Attack

Ah, yes.  I’ve told some of you about how I almost gave my mother a heart attack.  And it all surrounded Kayak Boy.  This one seemed normal at first.  There was decent conversation and he suggested a kayak trip for our first date.  He was tall, nice looking, could hold a conversation.  And then I met him.  And found out he was obviously pussy footing around having some mental health issues.  Then I found out his driver’s license was suspended after an accident (DUI, anyone???) and he expected me to always drive to him.  When I declined, his interest went from “I really like you and want to see you again” to “I just wasn’t feeling it.”

Episode 2 - Huggies vs. Pampers

Diaper Dude.  I chatted with this one many moons ago, when I was but a wee lass that decided to dip a toe into online dating.  What’s the number one thing you learn as you age?  Believe people when they tell you things about themselves.  Like Diaper Dude here.  His username included a brand of diapers.  I thought it was a joke.  Boy, oh boy, was I wrong.  Thought our limited discussions, I found out he wore diapers.  He said he had to and kind of liked it and he thought I was okay with the situation.  My friends told me I was an idiot when I relayed this story.

Episode 1 - Haven't I seen you somewhere?

Brazilian Dude:  Many moons ago I scheduled a date with BD.  After playing cat and mouse via text, we finally met late at night at a local restaurant.  He texted me when he arrived and I told him where I was and waited.  And waited a little more.   He drove by and called me and asked where I parked, so I told him.  And then the kicker:  he then tells me he sees his ex girlfriend's car in the lot and doesn't want to come inside.  According to him, he broke it off and she really was into him but he doesn't want drama.  

Welcome!

Well, well, well, we meet again, interwebs.  I had a blog for a number of years but left it to slowly die a forgotten death.  But I'm back and with stories!  Some of you have enjoyed some of my misadventures in dating, but I've decided to open it up for the world.  And maybe make an extra buck or two - those student loans aren't paying for themselves, mkay? 

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoy this enough to share, and feel free to comment and share your own dating misadventures!